Comments on: Sometimes a suicide needs a tribute – Updated

By: Suchi Chatterjee

Suchi Chatterjee — Mon, 02 Jan 2012 01:47:30 +0000

I grew up with Valerie in Jamaica. I met her when she was three years old, I was nine. I was a very young nine and Valerie became one of my dearest friends. I had learning difficulties, didn't make friends easily and was often ill. Valerie was a wonderful friend, we watched Sesame Street together, played with dolls together and for a few years had what seemed to be an idyllic life. But Valerie's parents marriage broke up, she returned to the US with her mom and I returned to the UK with my parents. I didn't know about Valerie's bi-polar until many years later. She didn't know that I suffered with an eating disorder, depression and other ailments. I guess we hid a lot of things from each other but despite time and distance I loved Valerie like the little sister I never had. When I was told she was gone I was stunned. When I was told how she had died, I wept. My beautiful, lovely Valerie, who wanted to marry my little brother Ranjit, who shared her Raggedy Anne dolls with me and never bothered that I was so much older than her and a lot less wise. Nearly six years on since she died I still think of her and I wish I could have done something to make a difference but then I suspect I am not alone in this wish. Miss you lots dear, dear friend. XXXX

By: Val

Val — Sun, 13 Mar 2011 15:07:04 +0000

Wow– i found this post after rummaging through a very old file, belonging to Valerie Ann Burgher. We share the same first name. Inside the file, were her writing samples, pics, a Yale transcript and friends' letters from all over the world. I was intrigued by this black woman whom i never met but who probably shared an apt with a guy who rented from me. I googled her name because i i was fascinated with her writing and hoped for her success. In my subconscious, I might have wanted to return her belongings. I am sorry to know that Valerie was suffering from bipolar and committed suicide. Suicide and bipolar run in my family but fortunately, i don't suffer from this horrible disease that is so easily misunderstood. However, i have had a lot of therapy and i am a psychotherapist. It is truly a very sad story. Yet, from her writings, I knew that she was special.

By: mypolaropposite

mypolaropposite — Thu, 29 Jul 2010 03:35:16 +0000

Thanks for reading, and for commenting. I remember Valerie going to Paraguay – I always admired her traveling spirit, since she went to the Philippines with the Peace Corps in high school – but we also drifted a bit during that time as well.

By: Jane Doherty

Jane Doherty — Wed, 28 Jul 2010 12:16:37 +0000

Hi there. I just found out about Valerie's death a few minutes ago doing a google search for her. I spent a beautiful and complicated 8 weeks living with her in rural Paraguay in 1991, where we were both volunteers with a program called "Amigos de las Americas". She was a dear friend to me during that time, and for a year or so beyond, after which we lost touch. I was so sorry to hear of her struggles, which I knew nothing about, and of her passing, and was very moved by your post and your tribute to her. Please feel free to get in touch with me directly if you'd like to chat.

By: mypolaropposite

mypolaropposite — Sat, 03 Apr 2010 00:25:47 +0000

Hi – I saw the search and wondered who it was. Thanks for reading, for commenting, and for thinking about her, as she is definitely missed by many.

By: T..

T.. — Thu, 01 Apr 2010 22:08:23 +0000

Tracey:

Great tribute. I came across this because I was feeling sad about the Empire State building suicide. Something compelled me to type Valerie's name into Google and that's how I came across your blog. I was in Pierson with her. While we were not close friends, I did occasionally chat with her in the dining hall. What a loss. Thanks for filling in the picture of who she was.

By: Leslie Copeland Tune

Leslie Copeland Tune — Fri, 12 Feb 2010 14:22:04 +0000

I think this is one of your best posts–and there have been lots of good ones. Lots of things are going through my mind right now…I think this brings home in the most eloquent and sensitive way, the importance of learning more about mental illness and de-stigmatizing it. You've also put a "face" on mental illness in a profound way–a way that takes the "scariness" out of it. Well done, Tracey.

By: laurenthedark

laurenthedark — Fri, 12 Feb 2010 07:24:48 +0000

:hugs:

By: uberVU - social comments

uberVU - social comments — Thu, 11 Feb 2010 21:55:14 +0000

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